Our Man in Antigua

don't mess with the expert

 right…BAC/Banco Industrial and INGUATE’s dog and pony show…gee, look..we found an MP3 player in the ATM…oooh…dipshits…AUG 2010, Las Vegas, DefCon convention, aka Black Hats…the creme de la creme of hackers…a Nz’lander fires up his laptop and remotely hijacks any ATM, installs a program called “Dillinger’ and another called ‘Jackpot’…good bye, cash…his parting words, unquote…’keep your money under the bed’…thanks, dude…no, he didn’t share the code because he’s on the good side but anyone who can do that…et cetera..’meeting the long outa town KG later tonight at an undisclosed location…’need to clear my cache of the latest skullduggery, rumors, slanders and innuendos..no further news of the El Caminante brouhaha…if you show up dressed as the perpetrator, Peter’ll buy you four bottles of Pavlov…hey, he made that offer to me earlier..the other Peter, the Hodge…great progress on the ‘hotel’ at the Salty Beaver…too bad there weren’t any pepper trees around…the Peppery Beaver has such a nicer ring to it, no? Sobremesa Two on track for March 1st re the ice creamery..stood on the sidewalk at 12:30 and scored two pounds of brown today….Finca Los Nieto’s fabulous Grano Cubano…the espresso roast that kicks Cubita’s lame Cuban ass..el Muro doing something different tonight…Coyote Ugly Night…’tempted to go by just to see what the standards are…with all the flocks of turistas in town, if you’re thinking of dinner or whatever, be prepared to have Plan B in place…by sundown all the flute sellers, jade necklace and fabric weavers will be exhausted from running after the crowds…if the Beav were ready, i think I’d bail…next week, given half a chance and a new ATM card..the late edition will come…later…as usual, another metaphor, another lame attempt at humor..get to the bar of your choice early..my best advice.

Part Two…from the looks of the crowds on upper 5th there’s gonna be some pissing and puking later…if not already but I didn’t want to get any closer…a mark of how many people are in town…even..yes, even El Sereno doing dinner business..met KG at DV for two superb martini’s..Claudia #2 knows how to stir(and not shake ’em)….went by Caffe Opera, ran into Alex and Broken Stone, on his way to DJ at Dos Reilly’s…arm inna sling, good attitude…’had hoped to hear Adan the Cuban pianist..’oh, he’s on his way’…horseshit…two very bad martini’s later…KG sent home…no cuban, just the piano..rains? how exceedingly unusual, everyone says..oh…news of Da Vinci…after 15-16 years, they’re moving…across from Chez Christophe, between Dasha and the bank…maybe open in April…the roof at DV is shot, the owner think they can sell the whole enchilada for 1.5 mil…150k for a new roof…lotsa luck finding a sucker for that one…hey..maybe Sangre’s owners will bite, since they obviously don’t care about cash flow..some kinda big horse show out by Ciudad Vieja in the morning..Tono was there, Fred Heywood says go…i will…just what i need, more horse shit..KG reported that when she was at Dos Mundos in December, two Danish folks were hacked by the ‘boys from Bogota’ and had no $$ to pay their tab…hello! she’s just back from the US and shortly off to Europe to deliver a paper on…serious pysch stuff…tis why we relate to each other..