Our Man in Antigua

no, not the speedy checkout line in the men’s room for 3 inches or shorter…my route of the night when the rains started up again and the cheapo 20 q chinese wonder-brella is only good for 15 openings before it self-destructs….or if the winds are more than 5 knots and it turns inside out…trivial thought…the venerable Monopoly game has four railroads: the Short Line, the Pennsylvania and the Reading…WTF is the 4th RR?

weird economic winds blowing thru this town: with the recent closure of Deliciosa, the Colonia deli on 7th ave, between 2nd calle/3rd calle is looking stronger(they’re smiling, it that’s a clue)…Epicure’s down to one location and …jeez, having a ‘senior moment’…the deli next to Pushkart…wtf? their shelves are still shrinking, content-wise. And yet, flying in the face of fate if not good sense, yet another restaurant opens on 7th ave..near the Colonia deli and named as if they have a clue: Leyonda Antigua…Antigua Legends…’give ’em a 30 day shot at it.

another casualty, and not good in my world…Da Vinci’s down to dos Claudias and the statuesque version doesn’t seem to be on the payroll anymore. And the beet goes on, now that she’s not on celery anymore, so lettuce change semaphores..why would one ‘joint’ that offer’s all the mojitos one can drink for 60q not sell any and a nearby ‘joint’ see 36 on a Monday?…weird winds of fate blowing thru, i tell ya..’talkin’ up Brendan B’s PayPal idea for local bars/eateries..point of sale, transfer the $$, take some change and more likely buy another round: the catch, according to one bar owner is that Guatemala is on some shit/black list for PayPal re deposits here…don’t know but I use PP, per BB the Buddha Bar at the Lake does, and so on..my PP # goes to a US bank, btw..if one could work out the logistics/kinks for the depository country, this could be a bonus round for some businesses here that cater to tourists.

Thanks, Hector, for pronouncing Rita-Hey-You over and over…slow motion, watch my lips…duh..my ‘language chip aka genetic markers’ isn’t working..i’m off(but you suspected that)in the morning for Rita whatever and Take-a-Lick Abaj for several days…get down in the dirt of a Maya site, check out the nightlife of Rita*WTF…and thanks to Lori S of GuateMedicalTourism, for turning the night into an Antigua version of a TupperWare party…’whipped out little ziplok baggies of Canadian mojo weed, passed ’em around and…no, i haven’t ‘road-tested’ the contents yet, at least not so far…Matt B! comparing our experiences at the superb Hotel Nacional iin Havana and the Vista del Golfo bar where they whip up…no,  stir/crush, swirl the original mojitos..two drops of angostura bitters, lotta sugar, lotta mint..’spent many an afternoon/evening in that spot..or on the veranda, whiffing a Montecristo #1..cuppa cuban espresso, shota rum…’maybe hit the el Gato Tueto across the street, Dos Gardenias, El Aljibe for dinner…ah, Havana..christ..’been 3 years since the last….met up with a lady from Carmel named Nola Rocco…’did the show at the Tropicana…ah, Nola…we were never meant to be…too Hollywierd, wearing her ‘movie crew/ jacket’ to bars in Carmel..yeah, she’d just made a movie there but it’s Carmel, for gawd’s sake..my old pal, Myles, had the starring role…f…king ham, but we all knew that going in. We were in Injah together, btw…riding around in tuk-tuks, circa 1978…weird weed there..

‘since i’m on the road til friday or so, this will be the final final til i’m back…enjoy your week: and what was/is the 4th RR in Monopoly? dos Reilly’s doing a big crowd at 8 or so…good for Henrik…las palmas empty, same-o for Polio Campero/Taco Discontento…Chez C doing tables, DV empty…wierd traffic flow..and that tienda next to el gato negro? the only joint in town with my brand of honduran pall malls..not even bodegona..wtf? ah, relax, jake..it’s chinatown.

lastly if not leastly…leastly? i’d checked out tour agencies last week for the ‘run’…got some quotes and then thought..’why not give someone I know the business?’…3 days later and a quote double everyone else’s, i bailed and went to the pro’s…Voyageur on 6th ave sur, next to the DHL office…jeez, babe..if you’d thrown in the rental car, i’d paid for everything else..maybe..as long as ‘what happens in Rita-hell-yes stayed in Rita..