Our Man in Antigua

this isn’t personal…this is biz…Bistro Cinq’s absinthe promotions? why? Absinthe is a bit sophisticated for any town (aside from those Frenchies) and I can’t even find a decent martini in this town (except for El Caz Italiano, B5 and the extra large knock me on my ass version from Camilla at Ocelot) the height of culture regarding booze in this town, in my limited perception, is Ilegal Mezcal…slam, bam, have another one…that, and beer by the bucket, or the ‘all you can swill for 60-70q’ dumbass promotions.

ok, off the sap box..yeah, i meant ‘sap’..Neil of Pangea reporting unusual crowds from an unusual source in the Lounge…Chapines from the City!..swilling the all you can version of mojitos for 60q until that state of rum-dumb is entered…i never thought that crowd would go for it but if one stops and thinks/drinks, or as Tono, the sage once said, ”let me drink about it”…the Lounge might be something slicker than the usual dive bars here…Studio 35 closed tonight…El Muro off to a slow start, with the staff(2)playing with themselves..no, that’s not right..putting on make-up and waiting for whatever.

F2, A Bell’s new mouse-trap on 4t calle, doing a crowd..the old location, aka “Roadkill”..? the new red/white vertical paint job didn’t do a thing…music? who knows? the schedule/players rotate like a floating crap-game in this town..dos Reilly’s doing a decent crowd and what’s up with El Gato Negro on 6th ave? two nights running, and empty…’never seen them empty and if this is some kinda sign…jeez, lose the backpacker crowd and there goes a lotta $$.

John Heaton’s article in the latest issue of Am-Ex’ Departure magazine? fabo..if i had an Am-Ex card and you’ve gotta have a platinum card for the mag…hell, i couldn’t quality for a Wal-Mart gift card…and my shit isn’t burning…the Nag Champa Sai Baba brand of incense i buy from Djinn?..made from dried/rolled cowflop and scented..’must’ve gotten a bad batch cuz they’re not staying lit (unlike some of us)…do i call 1-800-Bangalore?

‘ever read a business plan? there’s the overview, the nuts/bolts, mission statement and the exit plan..one of the better ‘mission statements’ i’ve heard is that of Jason’s of Lava..”I just wanna own a bar so I can get laid.” If you’ve ever worked a bar, then you know that at closing time there’s usually a few possibilities…new bartender in town! Cadena? french babe, starts tomorrow night at El Muro, already scored a 2nd job at Mono Loco and found an apartment for $195!…seeing long time commercial establishments letting people go and the owners now working the counters..wtf? no tourist bucks? no local lucre? kinda looking that way which is notta good thing for A-town, especially in mid-summer…’startin’ to look like there’s gonna be some casualties in the retail segments fairly soon…vacancies remaining vacant, places closing for no particular reason: i’m a thinkin’ that the owners of now-closed Deliciosa saw the handwriting, read the tea leaves and picked a good time to say ‘adios’…yeah, i know of places for sale but can’t talk about it…what’s up with the new BBQ restaurant on Santa Lucia? s’posed to have been underway by now…close to Polio Compero..El Pena del Sol, ‘Crash’ Harriss’ joint on 5th calle reporting steady trade…from groups, where he and Las Palmas have a niche: when one is packed, the other calls the other..and sends ’em over…’Crash’ reported a party of 60(!) sent over lately..damn..