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Archive for the ‘El Salvador’ Category

usually in a .22 or .32 caliber…not here…gotta have a 9mm or an AK-47….a murder this morning at 4am or such in San Felipe…and those pesky Mayan ladies banned from the park for selling their goods? even though they’ve been paying 300q a month for the privilege?   get this town cleaned up!….’heard that the Arms Museum is going into the Palacio…also heard an earful or two about Da Mayor’s track record/baggage/history….7 farmacias, a finger in the tuc-tuc biz and exactly how much is 27 million quetzals in $USD? my calculator gagged on the numbers..I’d been thinking(sic) that it was around $300-$400k but Taz/Plumb Bob said it was in the ‘millions of dollars.’..

likewise assumed that…’assume equals ass-u-me’…perfect’ that Jason was back per his green Triumph Bonneville parked in fromt of O’lot…wrong, scotch-breath…Taz riding/using it..the ever delightful Miss E providing biting social comments…observations..

an observer/reader of this raggedy ass excuse complained/observed that it’s lame/puerile/dumb and not much…right! of course!..never was, never will be and not intended to shine any light or provide anything more than a dim light into the corners of what used to be my mind and my daily experiences in town…like walking into Elle and Mo in the park earlier…they leave tomorrow and back to Canada/Toronto…it was a great week for them and now…married? the real adventure begins! jeez..’gives me the chills thinking about starting a new relationship, much less a legal deal like marriage..but hey, they’re young and in love: me, I’m just jaundiced/cynical. And one of our local bar owners asked why I’m never around about midnight, to see a different part of Antigua’s nightlife..

dude..think about it: Antigua’s night life is lame, slow and the highpoint is either dancing on the bar or getting your ass thrown out, into the street. At 68, I’ve done twice this shit, from Bangkok to Amsterdam, San Salvador to Costa Rica..where the drugs are better, the clubs are better and the women more beautiful…don’t get me wrong: this is my home and I like it, just the way it is…lame, slow and charming…two of which words describe me(A and B)..tomorrow? the Box Dudes provided reasonable facsimiles! progress, Guatemalan style..a map of Antigua is in the next print version and I’ll stick it in the next Amazon version..whoopee, right?..

it’ll be semi-amusing to see who shows up for the Pub Quiz at Ocelot tomorrow night..

 

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zo? the bi-annual flusher-roo of the little beasties that invade my tracts…amazing what energy returns and how quickly…one would think that vokda, scotch or rum would be a line of defense, a Maginot…oops, too old a reference..nope…Vermox, in a word. think ‘Wehrmacht’…Deutscheland Uber Alles and no, the Volkwagen didnt’ run over Alice.

some smiling faces on a few merchants in town per the infux..no, influx of Salvarenos with bux(and a lot still here)…was told that it’s the largest ‘influx’ since 5 or 6 years ago and for some wierd reason they quit coming here because of getting shot, stabbed, raped or 2 out 3…wimps..maybe ‘Mano Dura’ has made a few friends, souse of the border.

after getting pumped about the possibility of a bocce court with Alex’ Nido Antigua space, i started doing my ‘homework’..ninny…the courts are 60-100 feet long, 10-13 feet wide…the space available in back doesn’t stretch that far so unless…nah, it was a helluva idea(i thought so)..maybe an old fashioned pinball arcade..skee ball…no..wait! Whack-a-Mole! change the faces of the ‘moles’ to political figures…hmm? GW Bush, Cheney…god, yes!

Elle Patille’s wedding event coming soon, to a town near you…incoming on the 17th with the arrival orchestrated by Lex…lights, cameras, Lex!..the wedding the next night(small group)and thence a shuttle aka the Booze Bus hitting 4 places around town…razzle-dazzle…probably be a few  empty seats early on and after that? the luggage rack.

ho-hum, for me..the Olympics..badminton? c’mon…speed walking? bowling? stick with the basics, like spear-chucking, knife throwing and Crisco-smeared/sponsored Sumo wrestlers..take the tips off the foils/sabres and epee’s(I fenced epee for my college team) and when a spot of blood is seen, THAT”S a point…touche! ask me about those S&M freaks into sabres…pain, dude…it’s all about pain.

look’s like Mario is pumping up La Sala…Juan Calavera coming to town/play…’bout time that part of town had some action, eh? 

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yeah, it surprised me too: in the back room of the Sunshine Grill(upper north 6th avenida), where two of the B Team Gallo Girls were tonight, clutching roses and looking somewhat apprehensive(the dart board was getting action)…yeah, The B team: a little too porky here and there…’tried their ribs last night and….the meat fell off the bone, wedge cut fries and a greek salad that tasted/looked like a real one…had they used cucumbers instead of onions, it would’ve been ‘opah!’ time…cue Zorba..

The Cashbah Revolution is going full-tilt…Steve Wintershaw doing the wall murals and La Canoa taking over the top level for a restaurant…no idea what’s going on with the lower level/disco…is disco dead? at last?

The El Save-a-Dorenos are in town, with fancy SUV’s, fancy women and spending $$$..was told that they return, like the swallows to Capistrano/monarch butterflies to Pacif Grove (obscure California references) every first week of August….Sobremesa doing fine, the ice cream shop has two new faces serving up stuff and what’s new? wattle seed ice cream…some kinda Aussie thing, I was told…the Spanish Schools are back, the hostels have action and there’s a lot of white folks, young and old, in town..and about time…maybe August will wipe out the long faces left over from June and July..

#4 Calle 5th between the Bagel Barn and the health food store..vacant again…stick a ‘spa’ in there. What is a ‘Mayan Massage’ as advertised here and there? I remember what a Thai massage was…two Thai girls, an air mattress and a lotta liquid soap..

Price Wars! the travel agencies are getting antsy…the best deals I’ve seen are from Chisubin, on 6th calle oriente, #6, across from Hermano Hair Shirt Pedro Hospital..seriously..when my check clears from the Sperm Bank, I’m going somewhere…’shouldn’t be hard: people tell me where to go every day..

ah…ch’ch’changes…Nicky the Z is outa the job as Head Pro at La ReUnion as of yesterday…not exactly a kosher move by two of the partners, not notifying their other ‘partners’ but he’s taking it in stride(visualize this)and making plans with his sister…the sister! I might have made inappropriate remarks regarding her decolletage in Ocelot but she was distracting me, dammit..and very nicely, thank you…women: can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em…well, unless you’re a washed up/out sexagenerian with bad memories of the good mammaries…yeah, the moral tone of this, assuming there was any to start with, is gone…downhill, over the edge and gonzo…enjoy the end of the weak and I won’t mention that Judy and Linnett were talking about playing ‘Cornhole’..only in Antigua.

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if you had problems finding a tuk-tuk today, blame it on the demonstration along the Santa Lucia regarding the shooting/murder of a driver in Joco last night…yeah, they carry a lot of money: one of them, last week, couldn’t change a 50q note for me…did the perp hijack the tuk-tuk and depart for parts unknown? no answer…dumb move…

one of our local bar owners displaying an unusual amount of $$$ recently…from whence it came? rumors swirl….Da Mayor seems to have dispensed with his blacked-out Chevy Suburban in favor of a Mitsu SUV…maybe he had to trade the title to one of his lawyers?

another restauranteur or two off on a looong trip…where? no one knows or at least no one(staff)isn’t talking…probably just as well, since June is shaping up as a big flopperoo for many in the food/bev industry here…hey, at least we’ve got Fuego to watch at night: the lightning last night was exceedingly spooky…like the tree that falls in the forest and no one hears it..right? is there day light activity that we can’t see? maybe I need to ask one of the dogs..woof? no…woof woof..

and…a sizeable storm off the Pacific side of Guate…o good..more rain, mud and stuff…given that Otto the Prez is scheduled to visit Take-a-Lick Abaj next week, maybe by then he’ll take a rain check…hell, take a rain chick and stay in Rayo instead.

Robt Wheat, aka Plumb Bob, Alabama or whatever and one of the usual crew in the Beige Bomb,  taking off for San Salvador with what’s her face…Evilyn/Evelyn…weekend kinda getaway..Evilyne? Evil Lynne? nah, she’s sweet/nice and i like her..speaking of San Salvador, an amazing event underway: one of my oldest pals, whom I’ve known for 15 years(we met in Havana)is bailing from San Sal and moving to Malta..major WTF? and no, he hasn’t answered ‘why’…weird stuff..gotta wife, house and car in San Sal…this obviously means going to Lips in San Salvador and having a word with Dan, the owner and puts the kibosh of playing golf there (JK had a membership at Veraneras)…well, hell…Lips? yeah, it’s ‘hell’ but someone’s gotta do it.

‘scotch those rumors?’…refers to Bull Durham who’s got me drinking scotch again…waiting on tomorrows delivery of a rack of xlnt Tecpan pork ribs, as are the dogs…jamesdurham2@gmail.com for the very best in pork related articles/products..tomorrow? who knows or cares? since I’ve stopped wearing a watch I’ve become noticeably….as Tom Swift once said, ‘lackadaisical’ meaning i don’t care about flowers or much else…welcome to Antigua, Pilgrim…

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‘always wondered just what the hell that referred to and I may get a chance next Saturday…’ran into Roberto Fraser of the Rainbow Cafe yesterday morning, on his way to a cricket match in the City…the El Salvador cricket team, disbanded for a couple of years, is back! The City group has found a patch of grass large enough and there’s another match scheduled for next weekend…yeah, I’m going..

ah, the 3rd Annual Noche de Chefs? a sold-out crowd, some 300 tickets sold…idiot that I am, I didn’t read the tiny print on the ticket that said dinner started at 7pm, ‘en punto’…when I went by to pick up ‘her’, the taxi and I were on time but…half an hour later, it was obvious that this $$ was going to charity: I would’ve called Faith or Hope but they were out…simply put, I bagged it and I was looking good, too..postscrpt:: one of our more prominent restauranteurs walked out of the ‘Dinner’…disgusted with the food, service, attitude and the staff…you could say that he drove off in a huff but I think he was driving the van…’makes me glad I didn’t, etc..for those of you following the ‘4 Pigs/Land Rover’ piece, here’s the last part…

http://www.examiner.com/article/tijuana-jones-and-the-land-rover

the new Budweiser VIP room in what was Pangea’s Lounge? wall to wall/shelf to shelf bottles of Budski’s…I don’t get it but thats typical for me of  lot of things…and I’m still taken a back by  Ignacio’s loss of his leg…what’s he gonna do or?  makes one reflect on stuff like that and I complain about my feet hurting? shuddup about it..

Loris Shea and Mike Chrisman organizing a fare-the-well dinner at her place this afternoon, for the pending departure Tuesday of yet another ‘snowbird’…Roberto de Oro of Chicago leaves us again. Sis’ Barb still doing therapy after the surgery…I guess its just our assorted age group of the retired…where Depends has another meaning.

If you run into Jim O at Ocelot on Friday pm’s, when some of the ‘unidicted co-conspirators’ gather, ask him about the Technology Corridor or the Transoceanic corridor..or was it cuspidor? my memory or lack of it, you know…ah…the controversial ‘Lips’ story of the strip club in San Salvador? Dan not happy with the press coverage…the usual misquotes, innuendos,slanted versions…I like the place or more correctly I enjoy talking with him in the back office, as he’s got a helluva history…some of the girls aint’ bad either..

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so…the big ‘decriminalization’  get-together yesterday with the five heads of government of Central America? three…the narco-staters of Nicaragua, Honduras and El Salvador didn’t show up …well, I’m not sure about El Sal but the other two are ‘lay-downs’, which is an old used-car salesman’s word…

Nadoosh, the latest attempt to cash in on the failed ‘hookah’ concept?  been told  that they’re closing up shop soon…probably after Semen Santa..I still don’t get what the hell they were thinking, going up against Gaia..maybe if they’d had nude belly dancers or hash in the hookahs or hookers with hookahs…two of the three would’ve gotten my vote…gawd,hash…ah, the memories..thank you, Reed, for turning me on to Charles Bukowski…and i hear that the three of us left O’lot almost simultaneously last night before getting a blast of verbiage from a 4th party…semi-charming in the best of times..at best..

is it me or is the town more packed than last year? whatever, it’s  great for local merchants who’ve been counting the days if not also accounts payable..I am, now that I’m in this silly little business of print ’em/dump ’em and ask the musical question of ‘where’s the money?’

the ever delighful Miss M and i will be out this week, tripping over the cobblestones and looking for $$..the next 25..totally great/new/expanded/better than peanut butter will be out sometime soon and coming to a store near you..and I’ve lost my taste for the crowds of purple-gowned guys…virtual hordes…it’s like a bad movie about the Guatemalan version of the KKK…’good thing I didn’t take any acid(even if i had any to take)..i’m home on the range, the dogs are mellow, the fish still swim in aimless circles, cha cha cha..maybe more later, maybe not…this is sunday, after all and even god is s’posed to have taken the day off…probably had a good tee time and as i’ve often heard,only god can hit a 1 iron..

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thank you, Nicky Z, for making the day perfect…La ReUnion! choppers flying in/out, the place crawling with people and more players on the golf course than i’ve ever seen…John Kim, old pal from Havana days, now living in sweet San Salvador…brought the in the latest shipment of superb cigars and a type of Montecristo I’ve never smoked…superb day..E Larry Shaw joined us and if you’re playing golf with him, ask for strokes…for a guy who hasn’t played in “two years or so’ he’s incredible…the back nine? jesus…thanks to copious amounts of adult sports beverages and some decent meds, i may be able to walk in the morning…

Ocelot’s Happy Crew/Crowd…eyes on a couple of gringas in the patio, exchanging…no, not vows…lotta tongues…not our usual scene in this o so placid/politically correct city…Claudia #1, the incandescent one…hanging at Ixcot…yeah, with Manny the  Travel Agent, he of the weird sweaters and strange expressions…

thanks, Jon M for telling me that the sea shipment will be ‘two weeks late”…it’s ALREADY Late…whew..this shipping/printing/distribution stuff is making me lose my hair…what’s left of it…and what’s left is turning gray…double whammy…thanks, mother nature aka stress..Frener Printers has promised..yeah, right..to have last monday’s version out tomorrow…so? hey..it’s Chinatown…thanks to John K,I didn’t think about this stuff all day…that golf course is killer…the caddies were superb and the hamburgers? the best…the staff even brought me aspirin when we finished the first nine…topnotch service..the best golf course i’ve ever seen/played..Nicky Z…you very very lucky bastard to be working there..

Sangre? ‘been closed for almost a week now..door padlocked….asked one of the previous ‘principals’ but he had no clues to share…but then again, he never talks about anything, except the proper way to barbecue (and not ‘grilling’) thank you, again..one and all, for the very kind words about my writing..i’m humbled and blessed..and my back is F$#@ killing me…hasta manana..

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