Archive for the ‘Nicaragua’ Category

where have all the gringos gone? if I saw ten today that’d be about it…flown the Guatemalan coop for the YouEss of A?…today, Sunday? a totally Guatemalan buncha people, in the park, the streets and watching our own Andy the Mime…the largest crowd I’ve seen so far, blocking the section of 5th avenida north for a few hours.

so…if the Spanish school folks are gonzo, and the Christians likewise…leaving a few backpackers who haven’t figured out that school starts soon, what does that mean for A-town? biz-wise, it means that until the 15th rolls around(Independence Day) they’re sucking wind…last night, an almost full/blue moon and the first of the month($$)? emptiness…El Cazadore Italiano and Epicure doing a few tables and that’s all..folks..

part two of the  firework factory up/out…’el rancho de rockets’…I’ll paste a link tomorrow..the September version of Our Man in Antigua-stan to the printer and Amazon.com..tomorrow..this weekends’ weather has been superb and reminding me of why i live here..

again, major kudos(congrats)to Henrik of dos Reilly’s for the Granada idea…killer! I like  to think (sic)that i know Granada somewhat and….it’s a perfect fit.

Lili and her paper-selling compatriots are exempt…they get to stay…thank you, unnamed person, for stepping up..it just wasn’t fair. As someone mentioned, this place is being Disneyfied…day by day…ok…but use some common sense/logic….if you’re going to a gringo picnic tomorrow, get your wienie roasted (I’m not)..gotta little interview  to do.

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Saturday morning…thanks to the intervention of someone, in speaking with two PNC brass and the guy in the suit yesterday in the park, the decision to ban the three newspaper vendors is cancelled and in writing…nope, wuzn’t me..I was there but…

Lili, the ‘newspaper lady’ on the corner of 5th/4th? getting the bounce…outa there in a week, after 16 years in the same location..all the vendors around the park are getting the axe..are the shoeshine kids gonna be next? how about the taxis,  parked by the church? was told, by a 2nd hand source, that that ‘mayan’ vendors wil be allowed back in four months…altho judging/observing from a large gathering of same by La Merced this morning(and dispersed by PNC) that four months might not be long enough to put this fire out.

I’ve said and I’ll say it again…pick 5-10 of the top vendors with the best goods and license them to sell in/around the park. The ice cream vendors with their little carts don’t harm anyone…Sarita has a lock on the business..and what’s a few newspapers and how are people gonna find ’em anymore? I don’t get it but that’s true of a lot of things. Lets put people out of work? people with mouths to feed? the idea of only using “Antigua artists’ is absurd(to me)…who/where are they? the three cartoonists and Andy the Mime have a ‘show’?…dunno…it’s all too wierd…maybe have the latest perps caught raping/snatching/stealing brought into the park once a week for public floggings?..the park had color/vibrancy…

ok..off the box.. http://www.examiner.com/article/the-no-name-bomb-factory

Part One of an amazing discovery(to me)in the hills above town..’was told that the soccer stadium(near where I live)used to be the site for a gunpowder factory in the early days…El Polvero…again, unsubstantiated rumors so take it with a grain of #20 (the coarse grain)..

Ron Fortin, our wandering sax player, is back in town…look for him at Ocelot, early Friday night…no word from Nelson, up inna the States…somewhere…the music scene in town is at an all time low altho there’s some kinda happening at San Jose El Viejo Saturday night..8ish..60q per M Tallon..and I’m still blown away by the concept of a Reilly’s in Granada…next? San Jose, Costa Rica? perfecto…around the corner from the Del Rey?

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per Franklin Voorhees, mechanical genius and El Jefe of As Green as it Gets.org (one of my two favorite NGO’s) they are now selling ‘organically’decaffeinated Guatemalan coffee(thanks for the tip, Santiago that R. Dalton has been selling decaf for a while)…and the only ones/first/El Numero Uno to be doing so in this country…yeah, its a weird concept (to me)of coffee without the rush/jolt but there are tons of potential swillers who will now get a taste of one of Guatemalas’ premier products (other than chocolate or blow)…just kidding about the latter…it was the idea of the recently seized 17+ tons of paste that still rumbles around in my head…the difference being that one process (AGAIG’s) doesn’t use any chemicals to remove that pesky caffeine.

Ron Fortin’s back in town, playing his sax…catch him at Ocelot Friday night, in the patio..

3 of the prototype book holders are out/in various places…more tomorrow…more next week…yeah, I know, BFD..

‘ran into Walter Fischer and his big RED bus…the Antigua City Bus Tour!…3 more buses to to follow and I like the colors/graphics….let this work, please…the late lamented departure of the previous Antigua City Bus Tour was/is a great idea(and positive)for A-town…no word on if they’ll let the Mayan ladies board and sell trinkets but I kinda doubt it..  

  a Reillys in Granada?…as in, Nicaragua? fotos and a FaceHole ‘like’ button?..i like the idea, as Granada gets more tourists and it’s like Antigua in many ways…better horse carriages but they paved their cobblestones..weekend visitors from Managua, como Guatemala…it was on my personal ‘short list’ of places to move to, except for the heat/humidity…they’ve got decent Mexican food, my favorite breakfast place(Kathy’s Waffle House) and until the departure of Jimmy Three Fingers, the best bbq in Central America..and a better location than the once considered Livingston…a word about Kathy…it was a tragedy…tread quietly…

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meaning that there’s not a lot of content…yeah, you say..that’s typical but there’s even less than usual..

why has the Park been closed to vendors all week? cops on all four corners and no sellers of anything? WTF? expect some kinda march/demonstration about this, sooner or later..

La Casbah’s sign up again, over the old Djinn doorway…looks like another license issue, using the Cashbar license to flog the new/improved ‘english pub’ thing downstairs…como dos Reilly’s/Cafe 2000…i dont’ get it, but that’s typical…La Casbah…darts, warm beer, bad food and a pub?

the unlikely couple of the year…Miss Emma and Juan Mario Cervantes, our local ‘Kojak’? huddled at Ocelot?…JMC, per his new business card, is an ‘Asesor Despacho Ministerial’…WTF? I know what gazpacho is, but a ‘despacho’?

the two Carlas…Carla B and Karla H also in there for Happy  Hour..plus Plumb Bob and Hillbilly Tom…HT says that the Beige Bomb needs a water pump now and it’ll be ready to go…hell, he could use a water pump hisself…get better, dude..you’ve been losing too much weight.

 so/’zo…the ‘box project? yet again, a photo, a prototype and $ left for the ‘Box’ guy..who knows? the price stickers aren’t ready, despite promises…the book is now available in India…yowzaaa! BFD, to me…maybe a mini-dinner party here on the Finca Inka-Dinka-Doo with Elle, Mo and the Marvelous Miss M tomorrow evening….getting everyone’s schedule is like herding cats..

and what bar owner is driving a very new/snazzy BMW?..biz can’t be THAT good…and I dont’ think that the Prize Patrol comes to Guatemala…JMC said,in response to the question about the 17+ tons of coca paste seized last week, that maybe..just maybe he could get me some part of the lab samples…he was amused as I was to the concept/ultimate journey of this shipment…again, WTF? the implication of a lab with a large amount of chemicals like ether…benzene et al…Nicaraguan blow always smells like their gas..or diesel…sulphur, if you really wanted to know..yeah, I have a nose for these things….the week end is near..rest up..TLG aka the ‘Mescalitos’ playing at Caffe Bourbon tonight..

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in the immortal words of Alfred E. Neuman or was it ‘Neumann?…aka Mad Magazine…who cares/who knows? it’s just another Tequila Monday in this 3rd world country we call home…realize, as i have, that Guatemala is the same size as Tennessee but with twice the population…14 mil vs. 6 mil, give or take a few..and that our hillbillies wear huipiles..yeah, the education system sucks, the highways aren’t being fixed and the beat goes on…not

Cashbar? closed on a Sunday, Monday and Tuesdays? the new reality…ain’t no bucks/$$ in town…more and more cars with for sale signs..grim faces on some of the food/beverage people, hoping that June will bring in some turistas w/$$…segue way…in La Prensa this morning a piece about an italian airline now proving service to Managua (Nica)…WTF? there’s a demand for this? and no, the airline isn’t named Genitalia…drum roll..

Ocelot/Lava doing fine..Jason due in from Mother Russia in two weeks, assuming that he doesn’t get ‘side-tracked’ in Tijuana..dos Reilly’s very very quiet, Flor of Dasha snoozing at her PC/desk, not very incandescent/florescent…maybe its just another Monday and we’re all moving slowly…kinda like those butt-heads at INGUAT…Mexico is spending 52 Fu…..king million dollars on tourism re 2012…what is Guatemalo spending? INGUAT’s new head can’t even get their website up and running…his picture is all over it but….where’s the beef, dude? tomorrow’s rare Venus/Earth/Sun thing? fuggedaboutit…even Honduras/Copan is doing stuff(when their journalists are being shot) this country has a lot of potential for tourism, especially this year…Tikal, El Mirador, Takalik Abaj, Quirigua….it’s not even 3rd world/can’t get it together/banana republic stuff…call it lame/ludicrous…I’ve lived/worked in tourist-oriented places most of my life…San Francisco, Carmel, ‘Vegas, Hawaii…even Costa Rica and Nicaragua have their act together…Nicaragua? yeah, baby..o well, what, me worry?..maybe Otto has the right idea:  legalize drugs and have Antigua be ground zero for cheap blow…that’d ramp up tourism overnight…bolivian marching powder for one and all and an idea that’s nothing to sneeze at..nobody would be eating at the 150 restaurants but the bars would be doing great..pass the straw, dude..let’s go dance somewhere, eh?

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‘look’s good ol WeirdPress is doing it again…weird alignments but that can be said of a lot of us, especially after a few bebidas…here, drink six of these and figure out how to get home.

‘speaking of home, we’re starting to lose a few of the seasonal irregulars, leaving A-Town for other climes, other reasons. Prof Mike Donley leaves tomorrow, headed for the Pacific Northwest…Plumb Bob’s thinking about it, Reeds’ probably counting the days, as is Robto de Oro..the latest rains on the Rio Motagua wrecked havoc on another operation and that may well be the clue to pull the plug until next year…Barb the K(sis)is doing much better after her surgery, I’v heard…ah…a major loss of a grande dame of the old school…Lucia of La Viniera Antigua finally faded away….what a laugh, what a smile…per Beppe he’s also sold LVA, and the new owner steps up/in it on May the First…which means that Beppe’s moving to the City and we(I)won’t get to gaze upon the delights of his long-time ladyfriend, Margarita…her twin sister, Michaela?  if you recall the events of a few years ago, when they switched roles/places on him? too funny…

restaurant roulette? ever notice how some places are empty one night and then jammed the next? WTF? a case in point(of scotch, I wish) last night Caffe Bourbon full, Chez Christophe the same, dos Reilly’s slammed, Sobremesa full, Fusion waiting and waiting…M and i dropped off a load of ‘the little book that could’ there last night…I don’t get it…Ricardo’s Tabacos y Vinos? quiet and jammed the night before..the fickle finger of fortune, antigua style…Alex of Sobremesa dashing in with an apron load of his own ice cream for desserts for the diners…I’m trying to get him to start doing an ‘American-style breakfast’ like that of Kathy’s Waffle House in Granada…lean on him for me, would ya..

Dan of Ay! Robot!  just delivered a two hour lecture on comic books, in spanish, no less! huge tip of the panama for that one…imagine talking about anything for that long….well,maybe a few of my ex-wives/and/or/girlfriends…if I start something like that, slap me, ok?  



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so…the big ‘decriminalization’  get-together yesterday with the five heads of government of Central America? three…the narco-staters of Nicaragua, Honduras and El Salvador didn’t show up …well, I’m not sure about El Sal but the other two are ‘lay-downs’, which is an old used-car salesman’s word…

Nadoosh, the latest attempt to cash in on the failed ‘hookah’ concept?  been told  that they’re closing up shop soon…probably after Semen Santa..I still don’t get what the hell they were thinking, going up against Gaia..maybe if they’d had nude belly dancers or hash in the hookahs or hookers with hookahs…two of the three would’ve gotten my vote…gawd,hash…ah, the memories..thank you, Reed, for turning me on to Charles Bukowski…and i hear that the three of us left O’lot almost simultaneously last night before getting a blast of verbiage from a 4th party…semi-charming in the best of times..at best..

is it me or is the town more packed than last year? whatever, it’s  great for local merchants who’ve been counting the days if not also accounts payable..I am, now that I’m in this silly little business of print ’em/dump ’em and ask the musical question of ‘where’s the money?’

the ever delighful Miss M and i will be out this week, tripping over the cobblestones and looking for $$..the next 25..totally great/new/expanded/better than peanut butter will be out sometime soon and coming to a store near you..and I’ve lost my taste for the crowds of purple-gowned guys…virtual hordes…it’s like a bad movie about the Guatemalan version of the KKK…’good thing I didn’t take any acid(even if i had any to take)..i’m home on the range, the dogs are mellow, the fish still swim in aimless circles, cha cha cha..maybe more later, maybe not…this is sunday, after all and even god is s’posed to have taken the day off…probably had a good tee time and as i’ve often heard,only god can hit a 1 iron..

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